98 Reactions I Had While Watching The Stand (Episode 1)

Greetings, Gothamites!

I love Stephen King’s work. I have never read a Stephen King book and not enjoyed it. (Except the parts where the bad guys kill critters. But I don’t like that in anyone’s work. My cat also hates it because usually it means she gets an unsolicited cuddle.)

I must admit to only having read The Stand in its entirety once but it was the complete and uncut version. The original miniseries from 1994 is one of my favourite Stephen King screen adaptations though.

I was super excited when they first talked about a modern revival, even back when it was supposed to be a film (or multiple films) directed by Ben Affleck. So when they actually started announcing cast members and filming dates for this new miniseries, I was chomping at the bit. 

So grab your Purell, some tissues and a bottle of vitamin C as we journey through the valley of Captain Trips — and remember the spoilers are nigh! 

  1. Whoopi! 
  2. Wait, didn’t Mother Abigail have a thick southern accent?
  3. Was that just in the first miniseries?
  4. I really need to read the book again.
  5. They’re starting off in Boulder? That’s interesting.
  6. That’s a fair response to walking into a room of rotting corpses.
  7. “If you want to puke, son, you go right ahead” I love the positive bro support going on here.
  8. Though if it were me, it would be less “wanting” to puke as having no choice but to.
  9. I am on team the-guy-who-wants-to-rebuild-cinema-after-the-apocalypse. I like his priorities.
  10. The creep at the fence hole must be Harold.
  11. The visual of Harold getting pulled back from the fence hole was notably impressive.
  12. Wait, isn’t that the guy that played Patrick Hockstetter in the recent It movies?
  13. IMDb says yes. 
  14. BAM! Bitch went down.

  1. Okay, so Harold is a creep, but the guy threatening to cyberbully him is not cool and may explain why he has a manifesto.
  2. Bless you.
  3. Bless you.
  4. Gesundheit.
  5. Cemetery Dance Publications Easter egg! 
  6. Not the best day to get a rejection letter. 
  7. Oops, smooshed laptop. 
  8. Awww, guinea pigs!
  9. Stu! 
  10. Jim is pretty unflappable straight off the bat.
  11. And hilarious. 
  12. Oop, flashback time. 
  13. The man said turn of your pumps, Hap, not stand there staring at the oncoming car like a stunned mullet.
  14. Please don’t show what happened to the dog they’re talking about. 
  15. Jim has cottoned on to honesty being the best policy. 
  16. It means no one else is alive, Stu. 
  18. He touched the mucusy man. 
  19. Watching this after dinner was not a great idea. 
  20. I like Jim Ellis.
  21. It’s going to be a shame when he dies. 
  22. Whoa, emotional blackmail is not a good look on you, Jim. 
  23. Bless you. 
  24. Haha! Stu’s face when she sneezes. 
  25. At least she sneezed into her elbow. 
  26. Don’t answer him, Frannie. 
  27. Don’t do it. 
  28. Don’t.
  29. The tone of disdain when she replies says it all. 
  30. Awkward, Harold. Awkward.
  31. Ugh. Smug little turd. 
  32. Atta girl. 
  33. Yeah, I would freak out too. 
  34. Harold, baby, the last thing you need is a fucking gun. 
  35. Likely to shoot himself in the butt. 
  36. Not the worst thing that could happen, tbh.
  37. Oh, a lying politician. That’s not realistic. Politicians would never. 

  1. Frannie looks a lot like Heather Langenkamp when she’s in the cornfield.
  2. I … I thought Whoopi would be better as Mother Abigail?
  3. It was only a split second but I don’t buy she’s 108 and still makes her own bread. 
  4. What is this psycho doing now?
  5. I love James Marsden’s portrayal of Stu so far. 
  6. Jim’s like the friend who goes to someone’s house for dinner and has to sit there politely while the family fights.
  7. That shirt, the hair obsession and the repeated “tell me why” makes me think Harold is about to start a boy band.
  8. That face is how I feel when someone coughs in the supermarket. 
  9. Frannie, no. That’s not the way. 
  10. Imagine having to owe your life to Harold Lauder. 
  11. I totally bet he wouldn’t be the kind of twerp to hold that over you. 

  1. “Weird little brother.” Savage. Love it.
  2. He has a point about not being able to lose anyone, as much as I hate to admit it.
  3. The difficulty with which she said he had a smart idea is a mood. 
  4. Having read and watched In the Tall Grass, also by Stephen King with Joe Hill, I would not go into a cornfield to follow the sound of a child. 
  5. Especially given that there was a fake stream there before.
  6. What did I tell you, Stu? Now you have a spooky wolf. 
  7. Jim Ellis still keeping his humour while choking on his own snot is inspirational. 
  8. Oh, this arsehole. 
  9. Ew, leaking. 
  10. Watching this after dinner was really not a good idea.
  11. WHAT!
  12. Bastard shot my dude Jim. 
  13. Different leaking. 
  14. Well done, Stu.
  15. “Men like Cobb don’t stop following orders just because the orders stop making sense.” Great quote.

  1. Soldier stance. Nice. 
  2. No salute?
  3. I mean she was sitting right there, Harold, you could have asked. 
  4. Harold is such a creep. 
  5. Owen Teague is doing a great job of portraying him though.
  6. Oop, we’re back to Boulder. 
  7. I appreciate the different contrasts and lighting help differentiate between when we are, but I don’t love the hopping back and forth.
  8. Yeah, it really sounds like your misanthropic manifesto is “fiction” there, Harold. 

  1. Maybe don’t walk backwards towards a pit full of corpses without looking, genius. 
  2. Awww, his amphitheatre. 
  3. I hope that guy gets his cinema. 
  4. I love how they’re teasing the reveal of Flagg. 
  5. Oh, dear. Harold’s Tom Cruise impersonations are giving me second-hand cringe.
  6. Mister Stuart “Dog Cock” Redman made me laugh more than it should have. 
  7. Yeah, this definitely isn’t the manifesto of someone who is doing well. 
  10. If your military husband wakes you up on a military base and tells you to haul arse, you don’t stop to ask questions. 
  11. Although, to be fair, maybe not leaving could’ve saved 7 billion people so…
  12. I kinda love that Flagg’s theme song seems to be a Billy Joel number. 
  13. The Walkin’ Dude hitching a ride. Nice. 

I’m enjoying the show as a whole, but comparatively, I do feel there are some areas where it is clunkier than the book and the first miniseries. That’s by no means dissuading me from watching the rest but is worth noting. 


Share your thoughts

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.