69 Reactions I Had Watching The Haunting of Bly Manor (Season 1, Episode 1)

I thought The Haunting of Hill House was a masterful piece of horror and was tentatively excited for the follow up series The Haunting of Bly Manor so I decided to document the reactions I had during the first episode. 

Consider this your significant warning that thar be spoilers ahead, mateys. 

    1. Da-dum. Is there anything more comforting than the Netflix intro sound?
    2. Interesting — albeit over dramatic — intro. 
    3. Deadset already waiting for something spooky to happen in the bathroom. 
    4. I know her — where do I know her from?
    6. Glad we got that sorted. 
    7. I can’t tell if this is the best or worst wedding rehearsal dinner speech. 
    8. I enjoy this guy’s cynicism about the venue’s ghost stories costing extra. 
    9. Did she just intentionally make her super dramatic story intro rhyme?
    10. Because if so, that’s pretty impressive for an off the cuff “I’ve got a story” moment. 
    11. I would not hire an au pair who doesn’t look both ways before crossing the road. 
    12. I also would not hire an au pair who sighs and flounces around during the interview. 
    13. I’m so glad the dude rolled his eyes at the joke as well because damn, girl, get yourself together. 
    14. Oh, good, she has no experience as an au pair. 
    15. These children already sound awful. Maybe they’ll all deserve each other?
    16. Oh, wow, that “what’s the catch line of questioning”.
    17. They both hate each other already, this is surely going to be a healthy working relationship. 
    18. She’s getting him drunk to pry for further information — interesting tactic. 
    19. Wait. You SUPPOSE she died?! WHAT.
    20. Yeah, I wouldn’t take a job with a story like that.
    21. That second interview in the bar with them both drunk went way better. 
    22. I’m calling it now, one of her students died and is haunting her. 
    23. Actual footage of me sleeping in a car or on a plane. 
    24. Eyes on the road, mate. 
    25. Hey, Mr Uplifting, maybe you could work on your small talk?
    26. Are British country children really like that?
    27. Vampire slugs? I like this kid.
    28. Kiss on the hand, really? These kids can’t be real. 
    29. “I assume you made it in one piece?” … I … what? These people are not right. 
    30. Apparently everything is perfectly splendid.
    31. Shade from the brother.
    32. This tour would have me running out of the countryside. 
    33. Creepy little boy and precocious little girl? Tap out girl. Tap. out. 
    34. Creepy heirloom. 
    35. I like Owen. He’s cranky. 
    36. My goodness, let the man leave the hallway before you start gossiping about him. 
    37. Creepy dead au pair heirloom. Good start. 
    38. Little girl staring off in space and nodding at air. Dani. Read the room.
    39. Dismissed by a child. Ouch.
    40. No, really, is this what British children are like because they are creepy af. 
    41. Fuck all of those dolls but especially the one under the bed. 
    42. Background ghosties are one of the best parts of these series.
    43. Nothing is calling out to be explored. Stay in your bedroom like the creepy little girl said.
    44. Investigating a strange noise — everyone take a shot!
    45. I mean it’s not that hard to make tea. 
    46. It’s a spider girl, calm down. 
    47. This girl has a ghost filled dollhouse and is scared of a spider?
    48. Little boy reading through the BS like a pro. 
    49. I bet that’s their dad. 
    50. The fuck is a parapet? 
    51. FOOD FIGHT!
    52. Where don’t we go? The old wing. 
    53. Where is the au pair going? The old wing.
    54. There is a drunk dude walking down my street singing and it’s kinda killing the atmos. 
    55. Those are some old family photos. Why aren’t they covered up like everything else?
    56. What are the children doing while she’s off snooping everywhere?
    57. Of course Mr Wingrove didn’t tell her the whole story — why would he? 
    58. Oh, shit. Yeah, I wouldn’t have told her that part either. 
    59. That kid is giving off the creepiest Bond villain vibes ever.
    60. Hah. His sister calling him out on being a creep. 
    61. What the fuck. 
    62. Break the door down. 
    63. That’s one way to keep her in a bedroom at night. 
    64. This is why I’m never having children. 
    65. Go in your bedroom. 
    66. Go in your bedroom.
    67. Do not follow the muddy footprints. 
    68. Oh, for goodness sake.
    69. I would be just getting the actual f*ck out of there so fast. 

With a creeptacular ending to the first episode, I am already hooked. Who is her ghost? Are they actually there to help her? Why are the children like tiny aristocratic elders? What’s the deal with the lady in the lake? I am so looking forward to watching more of The Haunting of Bly Manor.

Image courtesy of Netflix


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