Schnacky Schnacks

Schnacky Schnacks: Treat Crate — France (June 2021)

So, I’ve been trying for some time now to film snack subscription boxes and there have been assorted issues throughout. I finally decided that while I continue to learn and work on filming, I would write up some reviews for my schnacky schnacks as I call them. This way, I don’t have months worth of schnack boxes piling up everywhere!

Treat Crate is the first snack subscription box I tried because it is based in Australia. I paid AUD$41 for this box, which includes shipping, a small booklet on the country featured, a menu of the included snacks and 10 snacks to try, one of which was a drink. This works out to approx AUD$4.10 per snack.

I’ve included at the start of each schnacky schnack the description as provided on the menu from Treat Crate. Please excuse my horribly outgrown nails in the photos. We are currently two weeks into a seven day lockdown and I was scheduled for a nail appointment the day we went into lockdown — and I was already a week overdue!

France is one of the places in the world I have wanted to go for a really long time. I finally got a passport and took myself off to Disneyland in California just before the plague hit so hopefully once the COVID threat has passed, I will be able to. In the meantime, here are some of the schnacky schnacks native to the land.


Malabar Tutti

You know how every country seems to have their own version of the tuck shop bubble gums with a fun tattoo inside that everyone grew up with? This is France’s take, in tutti fruity flavour!

This is exactly like the gum from my childhood that had collectable stickers and temporary tattoos. Look at the tattoo I got! Fitting, no?

Popping the gum in my mouth was like being transported back 25 years to the milk bar down the road that had these for 5c each. Get off my lawn.


Pepito Biscuits

There’s nothing more French than the romantic story of how two French bakers got married and began a biscuit business together in 1850. Today, LU is France’s No. 1 Biscuit Brand and these pepito biscuits are just one of their many product lines.

These cookies are like a digestive biscuit with a thin layer of chocolate along the bottom. Tasty but not mind blowing.


Madeleines

Madeleines are traditional French sponge cakes with a distinctive shell-like shape. They are a quintessential French treat that has been around since the 1700s.

The madeleines taste like sponge cake and are quite dense. I did find them to be quite dry, even though it was still nearly a year until the expiry date, but they had been shipped from France to Australia via goodness knows where so that could have affected them. Not bad but a bit plain.


Monster Munch

These Monster Munch potato crisps are a popular choice when serving aperitifs (snacks and drinks served to guests before dinner) in France.

These look like prawn crackers but taste a bit like disappointment. They’re not bad but there’s not really much taste of anything. I know they’re original flavour but they still tasted pretty bland to me. The texture once in my mouth felt a bit like a soggy Cheezl which creeped me out.


Carambars

These iconic French chewy caramel candies are known for their wrappers that display bad jokes (What did the 0 say to the 8? Nice belt!) We’ve included the original caramel carambar and fruit flavoured carambars for you to savour.

So I got raspberry and caramel flavours. I would be lying if I said I expected them to be these colours, but they were both quite tasty. The raspberry was quite soft and easy to devour, and it tasted like a sweet fake raspberry mixed with milko lollies. The caramel was quite hard and chewy, and tasted like quite rich, decadent caramel.


Pates de Fruits

Brought to you by high-end confectioner from Provence, Les Confiseries de Marion, are these delectable fruit paste bars packed with fruity goodness.

I did not like these. At first the texture felt like it would just be like a fruit jelly lollies but they I realise it’s real fruit (I really need to start reading the descriptions first) and it tastes like cold jam packed into a bar and covered in sugar. No, thank you. 


Breizh Cola

Breizh is the first brand of cola to be brewed and sold in Brittany, France. How does French cola compare to its international counterparts?

When I opened this and sniffed it, I was reminded of store brand colas. That’s exactly what this cola tasted like but it has this nasty dusty aftertaste that made my tongue curl.


Tartlets

When the gods and goddesses of pastries came down to earth, they settled down in France and they created an abundant range of desserts, such as these tarts (raspberry and lemon flavoured) included in your Treat Crate.

I don’t generally love shortcrust pastry or other sweet pie crusts and this one was passable but I still didn’t love it. What I did love? The lemon filling in the lemon tartlet. Mmm, sweet lemon curdy goodness.


BN Chocolate Biscuits 

Biscuiterie Nantaise (BN) is a biscuit factory historically located in Nantes, France. This factory is famous for feeding French soldiers ‘hard bread’ during war times, which was then later improved to become biscuits.

These are nice sweet biscuits. The biscuit itself is quite dense as is the chocolate cream filling. The chocolate filling’s flavour is quite muted in contrast to the sweet biscuit but they’re okay.


Balisto

These wholemeal almond and honey bars are manufactured by Mars and consists of a digestive biscuit centre and a variety of milky cream toppings, coated in milk chocolate.

This is quite a nice biscuit based chocolate bar. It tastes a bit like a Twix if the caramel was replace with an almond paste. I must admit I can’t taste much of the honey but, given that I don’t love honey, that’s probably for the best. 

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